that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
