great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
