scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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