it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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