and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
