It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
