If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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