can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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