the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
