Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
