Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
