I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize