So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize