I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
