my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize