It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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