girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
