lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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