ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
