You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
