I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
