I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
