fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
