I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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