I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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