it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize