perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize