My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm at about main and main street
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
