I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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