drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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