Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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