My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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