yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
