Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
