Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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