Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
