IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
