So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize