Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
