On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
