we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
