you guys were way drunker than both of me
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
