is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
