My liver just broke up with me...
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize