If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize