i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i think i have herpe
just one?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
