Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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