I wannas sexs uuuuu
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
