I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
accomplished twins. life is a go
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
