It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize