i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
she peed on how many people?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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