My brain says no but my pants say off.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
